Monday, March 14, 2011

The JDate Stalker

I used to have another blog, which I have long given up on. However, it seems that one post in particular was extremely popular. So back by popular demand, here is The JDate Stalker post that was posted on my previous blog in April of 2009. Keep in mind that these events took place before I started dating the now fiance. And now, I did not meet my man on JDate. Enjoy!

The JDate Stalker – An Entertaining True Story…

A few months after I moved to Atlanta I had my heart broken and needed a boost in self-esteem. The cure: creating a profile on JDate. While I got what I wanted out of my trial month (without paying), I also got more than I had hoped for. Let me start from the beginning because this story is just too entertaining not to give you all of the details.

Where what happens?
Where what happens?


One of my friends had been living in Atlanta for a year before I moved here and she decided to use JDate as a way to meet some new guys. She started talking to a guy (*we will call him Brian and we will call her Lisa) who, like her, was from South Florida and had moved to Atlanta after college. He also worked for one of the major sports teams in Atlanta and she was in school for a sports-related degree. Another plus. This is as far as the common/good traits go… They had arranged to go to an Atlanta Braves game together and meet up with some of his friends. Sounds like fun, right? Well in theory it was. Brian picked Lisa up at her place, which was further south than he lived and also on the way to Turner Field. However, when he left her place, he started driving north (away from the stadium). Even though she was newer to the city, she knew this was not right and asked him where he was taking her. He told her that he needed to run home and grab a few things before they headed to the game. Fine. She went upstairs with him where he then proceeded to sit on the couch with her and try to hold her hand. RED FLAG! She immediately demanded to go to the game and after much hesitation he obliged.

What a freak!
What a freak!



They were finally in the car on their way and she thought that it couldn’t get any worse. Boy was she wrong. They got to the stadium and he proceeded to take her to their seats, where it was just the two of them. She asked him where his friends were that they were supposedly meeting, but he acted like he didn’t know what she was talking about. Lisa then excused herself, called a friend to pick her up, and left Brian at the stadium dateless. Whoever said JDates were harmless is clearly wrong!

What does this have to do with me might you ask? Well, Brian, the JDate stalker was hungry for his next pray and decided I was a good target. Boy was he wrong!

(Sidenote: Brian is completely harmless – he just lacks in dating and somewhat of the social skills. No females were harmed during his JDating tactics.)

Now back to me… Brian originally messaged me with the normal chit chat:
“I see you are from South Florida – so am I.”
“Do you like sports? Well I can get you
tickets to the SEC Championship game (which my Florida Gators were in).”
“You live in (enter my first Atlanta apartment complex here) – I live there too!”

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Being that I am a Jewish girl, I had to call my good friend Lisa to tell her about all the guys I was talking to on JDate. After discussing with Lisa about a few uglies who actually thought they had a shot with yours truly, I decided to mention Brian. She told me that I had to call her immediately and to stop talking to him right away. This is when she told me about the story above and that apparently he had done something very similar to another friend that he had met on Match.com. Yes, that’s right, he was a multiple dating website user. After Lisa filled me in on how sketchy this guy was, I started to notice it more and more. I decided that I would NEVER meet up with him and just start to ignore him in the hopes that he would go away, but yet keep in little touch in the hope that he might be able to get me tickets to the SEC Championship game (evil of me but you gotta do what you gotta do for the Gators). I would put up my away message on AIM saying I was at the gym, and five minutes later he would show up at the gym (remember, we lived in the same complex). I would put up another away message saying, “getting ready to go out” and would come back to a number of instant messages from him asking where I was going. This had to end!

Now for those of you who know me well know that I 1. don’t take crap from anyone, 2. express exactly what I am thinking out loud, and 3. make my presence known. This guy was going to leave me alone for good. So what did I do? I blocked him on AIM and ignored his JDate messages like a coward…

Now it has been 2 1/2 years (**now more than 4 years**) since my JDate stalker struck. I was talking with a friend who had moved to Atlanta a few months ago and she decided to try JDate out as a way to meet some new people in this new city. She would tell me of the guys she would go on dates with and talk to through the dating site, but I didn’t recognize any of them. Until she mentioned a guy that sounded a lot like Brian. Alas! The JDate stalked was still single and still at it years later. So I filled her in on mine and Lisa’s stories about him and she immediately faked illness to avoid the date they had set up for that upcoming weekend – SAVED!
Sorry, but I have the Bird Flu and won't be able to date you. But it's for your own good!
Sorry, but I have the Bird Flu and won't be able to date you. But's it's for your own good!

Now you all know one of the many reasons that I am completely against JDate. I know it works for a handful of people. I even have a friend who met her husband on the site (as well as my sister and now brother-in-law). But here in Atlanta, it kind of sucks! At least it did for myself and Lisa and a number of my other friends, including my former roommate. But I do have to say it makes for some good stories and girly bonding moments over stalkers and weirdos.

*Names have been changed to protect the identity of the parties involved

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